01 April 2011

I have always proceeded by trying to master my subject matter. If I were buddhist perhaps this would not so get in my way. As it stands, I don't think my methodology does much to nurture creativity. Today in class I had a little meltdown over theory and, as my professor kindly suggested, the lack of creativity in the way people in the humanities are trained. For the uninitiated, historians have an intellectually dishonest way of nodding "anonymously" to powerful ideas, while people in English departments endlessly name-drop and learn to write like a person suffering from serious mental illness. My teacher is always curious in a productive way, and that is why I picked him to be my teacher, to point a way out. I don't know that I'm capable of learning. I excused myself from an optional writing assignment in order to spend time reading about something else.

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